Hello from the Other Side

There are many facets and sides to me. Sides most of you never encountered, regardless if they are light or dark. It has been a long journey of coming to terms with the broadness of the spectrum of emotions, behaviors and thoughts I am capable of holding and embodying. A long journey to embrace...

The sweetness of being loved by Self

It is hard for me to find adequate words for the experience I find myself immersed in. I am in awe and floating in an ocean of gratitude for the tender loving care I am experiencing at the hands of my Self as she heeded my call for support in healing and transmuting the...

Catharsis

I haven’t cried this much while reading a book in decades. I cried over the perpetuations of pain across generations, the relational mutilation of the men I know intimately and love, the pain their pain brought to our relationships and me, I cried over all the wasted energy in attempting to understand, help and...

True Name

There are parts in me that prefer to bypass and avoid what was or is painful, deemed by them as shameful or inappropriate for conversation. They are the reason I learned not to mince words and call things by their true name instead of sugarcoating. These parts in me are complicit in keeping me...

The Oppressor in Me

The most challenging experience I have had to date is facing, knowing and meeting the oppressor and victimizer in me. Meeting this archetype, expressing consciously and unconsciously through me, with curiosity, facing the judgements and attachments I observe arising in me when engaging with her or being identified with her, feeling the emotional responses...

Male Feelings of Inferiority and Patriarchy

There is a pattern in my life of men feeling inferior or less than me. My responses to it varying between trying to ignore it, degrees of discomfort, trying to make them realize its untruth, feeling frustrated, a shame fueled repulsion or numbness towards them…. which sometimes ended up disrupting or even ending relationships...

Reconciliation

The subject of reconciliation has been on my mind and in my dreams for a couple of weeks. It has been an enchantingly romantic idea of my inner child that every relationship (familial, intimate, friends) and hurt can, and will, be reconciled, if you love each other and try hard enough. Of course life’s...

Shadow Work

“Shadow work is the path of the heart warrior.” ~ Carl Jung I have spent large parts of the past years witnessing my shadow aspects as closely as I could while living my mundane life. You could say my awareness was permanently split in external and internal awareness for the duration of their arising...

Fear of the Body

I had a surprising realization yesterday while I was in the midst of a current practice to release fear programs. Suddenly my mind turned towards my body and I saw that after all the work in self love and honoring of my body there was still deep down in my subconscious a FEAR OF...

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