I have been noticing lately several people pointing out that what they are currently looking for in relating is emotional safety. And it made me reflect on why that didn’t fully resonate with what I am experiencing and wanting to delve into more. Safety has for the longest time been on the forefront of my mind, though it referred to physical safety from potential harm through violence. But that...
Reconnecting with beloved connections, which had been absent for a while from my life, has a gentle healing effect on my relational system. As memories birth ever new feelings, thoughts, and sensations my present awareness observes it all, while engaging with the beloved friend. Observing the layering of memory born sensations, watching feelings and thoughts scoring initial moments of reconnection, like music enhances and colors a movie. First there...
I am realizing how much I have been habituated to a ‘subculture’ expressive in appreciation, compassion and love, which is far removed from the usual way of relating in this world. It has been a key part of my healing journey to be surrounded by soul kin who embody a more attuned, loving, and verbally expressive appreciation for life. They have modeled a better, or rather a more natural...
Growing up in a family where people displayed codependent and covert narcissistic traits my system was entrained with a lot of misperceptions and distortions. Making me all too comfortable with dynamics and relational patterns that were not only unfulfilling and asymmetric but also harmful to my mental and physical wellbeing. This is why I had to explore and learn the differences and qualities of being needed, wanted, and valued....
After A While After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul, And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning And company doesn’t mean security, And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts And presents aren’t promises, And you begin to accept your defeats With your head up and your eyes open, With the grace of a woman, not the grief...
