Retreating to Heal

In cycles of deep inner healing I observe myself retreating from certain people not from a space of judgement but from an intuitive knowing that their energy is disruptive or detracting from my healing.

Harshness, judgmental attitudes, criticizing, unconsciousness and coldness are uncomfortable in our adult, detached or armored states. When we delve into inner child healing, opening to the rawness of our essence and our darkest stories of inadequacy and unlove, we are once again experiencing life as the highly sensitive and defenseless child we were and these things become nigh unbearable.

Only few people have the emotional intelligence to be present with us without eventually switching into auto-piloting from their subconscious and being thoughtless and hurtful when triggered.
And as painful as that is, it is not their job to be different to protect our inner child, it is ours to take ourselves away from such people and encounters until we healed enough to handle them without hurting ourselves unnecessarily.

An integral part of taking responsibility for ourselves is being mindful of our states, feelings and boundaries and honoring them to allow our self to evolve and express fluidly as well as to be kind towards others.

We don’t live in cultures that value tender and fragile aspects of our selves and as we are remembering how to do so ourselves we will be often challenged. Yet as we progress along our path of healing and exploration we come across those who can be guardians of our tenderness and gardeners of the flourishing of our souls.

I am grateful for this innate wisdom of moving towards integration and love.
I am grateful for my role models of vulnerability, emotional intelligence and holding space.
I am grateful for the friends and family with whom I get to experience safe spaces and grow from my mistakes and learn to be gentler and fully present.
I am grateful for those who hurt me in moments of vulnerability and allowed me to experience my inner strength and resilience.
I am grateful to myself for getting clearer on what I need and what works for my wellbeing and expansion and for learning to move away from who and what doesn’t serve me.

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