Resetting to Real

The more I retreat from socializing virtuallyThe more I am unavailableThe richer my remaining encounters and relationships are A lovely paradox to live, navigate and experience. That is one way of putting my latest experiment in relating in a nutshell, of course the experience itself is much more nuanced and the insights gained multidimensional and manyfold. Retreating from social media and its temptations in staying connected with those, who...

Transparency in Relationships

What is transparency in relationships? Transparency means to be open, honest and truthful.In the context of relationships, it is vital to the evolution of the partnership. It shows trust in our partners and our ability to be vulnerable and let someone in to what we are experiencing. Without transparency, there is no sharing and it shuts down growth. Lack of transparency or openness can cause issues in relationships. Deflection...

2020 Hindsight

This year has been about realizing and embracing uncomfortable truths, making hard decisions and holding myself accountable to a higher standard than before. It has been a year of illuminating and cleaning up what my ego successfully hid under carpets and in dark corners of my mind. A year of cutting out little and not so little ways my ego cuts corners with regards to my health and wellbeing...

On Fragility, Tenderness and Sensitivity

I was raised in adverse circumstances that favored and rewarded strength and harshness and mercilessly exploited tenderness and sensitivity to torture and deride the little girl I once was. To survive I emulated these attitudes consciously and subconsciously in parts of my internal tribe. Inadvertently and sadly taking up the role of abuser towards myself and others in its wake. Rarely allowing myself to feel or own moments of...

Milestone

I think this is my favorite milestone to date in the journey of love:  The moment I KNEW that I am ready and fully capable of loving another in their light AND darkness, EVEN if my darkness is raging in the loudest language of trauma. This is a self mastery I wouldn’t have believed I was capable of just a few years back and yet I choose to work...

Oceans and Cliffs

“The waves hit the cliff with more intensity than the shore, because the ocean knows the cliff has that masculine intensity which won’t complain about her feminine energy.” ~ Nityananda Das If I would have seen the above quote years before I would have laughed and asked to see such a man. The only people I had ever experienced meeting feminine energy in her wild and intense emanation with strength...

Wings

“I have come to accept the feeling of not knowing where I am going. And I have trained myself to love it. Because it is only when we are suspended in mid-air with no landing in sight, that we force our wings to unravel and alas begin our flight. And as we fly, we still may not know where we are going to. But the miracle is in the...

Reconciliation

The subject of reconciliation has been on my mind and in my dreams for a couple of weeks. It has been an enchantingly romantic idea of my inner child that every relationship (familial, intimate, friends) and hurt can, and will, be reconciled, if you love each other and try hard enough. Of course life’s experience has proven that idea to be mostly unrealistic.  Humans often prefer to gloss things...

Apologies

“Sorry!” is often not enough when you hurt someone or cross their boundaries in unacceptable ways to their being. “A good apology is like antibiotic, a bad apology is like rubbing salt in the wound.” ~ Randy Pausch I used to think of apologies as the panacea of healing or an adding of insult to injury depending on their delivery and subsequent actions. As I operated from the idea that...

Falling out of Love

“One of the biggest fallacies in our society is that people fall out of love. Love changes and shifts, sure, but people fall out of respect, intimacy, and trust. They don’t fall out of love.” ~Christine Arylo Photo: Drop by Alex Stoddard...

Scroll to top