Reflecting on current experiences I realize that there has been a shift in my communication preferences I haven’t been fully aware of. I am way less affected by the communication style of people because of changes in my relational system and levels of self love. Few still manage to get under my skin and remind me to step into my inner spaciousness, observe my reactivities and stories my ego fabricates and the intuitive messages I am getting about the state of the connection before responding from clarity and equanimity. ⠀
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In our busy times and the stress people live with I understand that they will reply whenever they can and feel like it or potentially from depleted energy levels. And to be honest I would rather get a “late” message crafted with care and love after someone attended to their own needs than a hasty thoughtless reply devoid of presence by someone who keeps themselves depleted and frazzled. ⠀
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Yet I get miffed when people do not show respect and care for the connection by breaking their word and vanishing in the midst of virtual conversations when it takes only a minute to send something like “I am swamped, will get back to you asap” and doing as you write or let me know you do not want to communicate. No need to feel guilty about delays or forgetting but the lack of accountability and communication sucks. ⠀
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I prefer people who are kind with me and bring empathy and mindfulness to the building and nurturing of relationships.⠀
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Repeats of radio silence, apologies but no change of behavior, promises of getting in touch just to fall off the face of the earth, act like all is well or half-heartedly apologizing are sure ways of diminishing my respect and trust. There is no relationship once respect and trust are gone.⠀
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I do not get sad, angry, frustrated or confused at such behaviors and treatment. I step back and assess my energy, contemplate how I invited this experience, learn what can be learned, address it with the other if there is hope for change or resolution or else move on. ⠀
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It is not that hard people, do not allow your ego to alienate you from the people you profess to like or love! Is this how you truly want to be?
Communication
