Disappointment is a wondersome and often misunderstood teacher. There are many layers and subtleties to its gifts of insight into my unhelpful beliefs, forgotten pain, behavioral and thought patterns, and my sweet little girl‘s longings that remained unfulfilled. Illuminating attachments in need of attention, transformation, or release. Alerting me to contractions, stuck energy, and tensions alive in my body. Inviting me to become intimate with the complex ways I...
Giving generously and freely, something that nourishes my being through full alignment with my soul’s nature and I love dearly, has often been turned into a pathway to harm in my experience. Years back, I have been guided to step away from generosity and taught to painstakingly observe, witness, and analyze the dynamics of giving and receiving in my relationships. Learning to differentiate between healthy flow of generosity and...
I am laughing at the absurdity of investing my energy in trying to co-create a relationship with someone and then allowing myself to be drained and depleted, experience rejection, neglect, emotional scarcity and other painful states in the process of it… when I KNOW, from experience, that putting only a tenth of that energy in my relationship with Self and Source creates an overflow of contentment, love, creativity, passion...
There is a pattern in my life of men feeling inferior or less than me. My responses to it varying between trying to ignore it, degrees of discomfort, trying to make them realize its untruth, feeling frustrated, a shame fueled repulsion or numbness towards them…. which sometimes ended up disrupting or even ending relationships I otherwise valued highly. I had witnessed with increasing awareness the emotional charge held in...
The child in its ignorance craves an exclusive love that is not humanly possible. The love it wants is selfish; it does not want to share love with others, with brothers or sisters or even with the other parent. The child is often unconsciously jealous of both parents. Ye if the parents do not love each other, the child suffers even more. So the first conflict arises from two...
