There are parts in me that prefer to bypass and avoid what was or is painful, deemed by them as shameful or inappropriate for conversation. They are the reason I learned not to mince words and call things by their true name instead of sugarcoating. These parts in me are complicit in keeping me tethered to the past and keep recreating suffering over and over again.
If I cannot speak the true name of something, consistently, it retains its power over me and I will not grant such power to anything or anyone.
Calling things by their true name has a deeply transformative effect that can be felt viscerally as well as subtly. It rips the veils of gaslighting, manipulation and mind control by disrupting their false narratives and distortions of reality. Allowing for integration and healing of the past by reclaiming our sovereignty and standing in the power of our truth.
Words have power. We need to use them wisely, not as weapons to hurt another, as we were taught, but as tools of dismantling illusions, lies, oppressions and injustices within as much as without.
Therefore I will keep calling the “religious group” I grew up in a CULT as that is what it is, I will speak about my childhood’s spiritual, mental, emotional, physical and sexual ABUSE and TRAUMA as many have and are currently experiencing the same and worse, I will speak about having been a REFUGEE fleeing WAR and being an IMMIGRANT for visibility and hope in support of those experiencing it today, I will speak about RACISM, WHITE SUPREMACY, MISOGYNY and MISANDRY and other TOXIC CONDITIONINGS we all share as much as I will speak of all the gifts and treasures I received along with and through these experiences.
I don’t do this to garner pity or attention for my “poor self” but to disrupt that pattern by a) normalizing truthful speech sans bypassing or sugar coating of the shadow aspects for myself and those who welcome it, b) by embodying that what happened in my life doesn’t define or limit me, and c) to end the silence and/or to shift the way we perceive and speak about shadow and dark aspects.
When I center the shadow aspects or what might be perceived as negative or triggering name for an experience or period of my life, it is not done in a spirit of forgetting about or dismissing the good that came with it by holding to a negative frame of my experiences. It is done in service of making the unseen visible by illuminating the dark and its potential gifts. I have not forgotten the good nor do I lack in gratitude for it.
There will be no enabling, support or celebration of avoidance or pity parties to be had with me. There will be inquiry, curiosity, openness, empathy, compassion, laughter and tears as we candidly reflect your experiences and mine.
There will be no trigger warnings here. I trust you to manage information according to your needs and resources.
The light of awareness, truth, love and consciousness are alchemical agents of transformation. When we speak truth to lies, illuminate the dark, and cut the chords of identification and attachments our words can speak magnificient new realities into being. This is the path I choose to walk and you are welcome to walk by my side.