I realize that many people do not get the full scope of the meaning the word healing holds for me and others who are on a similar life path or who engage in their and other people’s healing with discernment and awareness. For most people the word healing describes a goal-focused process akin to the healing of a cut in our skin: a localized process of hurt, inflammation, scabbing...
I believe no one was more surprised than me when my intuition gave me a nudge to start online dating again after having stepped back from it for years. And what a very different experience it was this time around thanks to the ways I have changed. I was not attached to the outcome and it felt like an eerie experiment or adventure life was sending me out on....
“It takes courage to endure the sharp pains of self discovery, rather than to choose to take the dull pain of unconsciousness that would last the rest of our lives.” ~ Marianne Williamson For a long time I have been perceiving things along the lines of this quote, believing it to be a primarily a question of individual courage if someone walks a path of self discovery and self...
Playing with new tools of making sense of internal processes and relational dynamics and communication has been fascinating. Congruence and incongruence have been centered in revisiting of past and analysis of current experiences. Slowing experiences down to a crawl, sending them through new layers of inquiries into subconscious perceptions, subtle projections, and distortions. Acknowledging meanings of my creation and the feelings these cause, observing feelings about the caused feelings....
I was raised in adverse circumstances that favored and rewarded strength and harshness and mercilessly exploited tenderness and sensitivity to torture and deride the little girl I once was. To survive I emulated these attitudes consciously and subconsciously in parts of my internal tribe. Inadvertently and sadly taking up the role of abuser towards myself and others in its wake. Rarely allowing myself to feel or own moments of...
I have patiently sat with my pain and anger, learned the lessons that I attracted for this part of my journey and affirmed, once again, my wholehearted commitment to Self and Source. Now the time has come to close out this chapter, to cut ties with these aspects of the past, discard what is dead, let go of what no longer is life-enhancing and head towards creating happiness, love...
I think this is my favorite milestone to date in the journey of love: The moment I KNEW that I am ready and fully capable of loving another in their light AND darkness, EVEN if my darkness is raging in the loudest language of trauma. This is a self mastery I wouldn’t have believed I was capable of just a few years back and yet I choose to work...
I want to share a bit of my healing story as an acknowledgement of the cycle I have been experiencing and as a seed of contemplation, feeling or sensed transformation for you. In the past 5 years I have shared a little on the disruptions, betrayals and ending of friendships that were very dear and precious to me. Yet I did so only haltingly and while keeping the depth...
There are many facets and sides to me. Sides most of you never encountered, regardless if they are light or dark. It has been a long journey of coming to terms with the broadness of the spectrum of emotions, behaviors and thoughts I am capable of holding and embodying. A long journey to embrace the parts that triggered my fears and deeply embedded and repressed feelings of shame. There...
I am laughing at the absurdity of investing my energy in trying to co-create a relationship with someone and then allowing myself to be drained and depleted, experience rejection, neglect, emotional scarcity and other painful states in the process of it… when I KNOW, from experience, that putting only a tenth of that energy in my relationship with Self and Source creates an overflow of contentment, love, creativity, passion...
