“Because others cannot vibrate in your experience, they cannot affect the outcome of your experience. They can hold their opinions, but unless their opinion affects your opinion, their opinion matters not at all. A million people could be pushing against you, and it would not negatively affect you unless you push back. They are affecting what happens in their experience. They are affecting their point of attraction—but it does not affect you unless you push against them.”
I have been celebrating a new milestone in my journey as of late. The shift in how I respond to contrast from close or intimate relationships. Instead of trying to make them align or harmonize with me, I have finally taught myself to simply accept reality as is. My rebellious and willful aspects have come to see and embrace the futility of fighting or distorting reality.
True power begins in the moment I see and accept reality as it is, when I abstain from projecting on it my fears or wishes and instead ‘dare’ to let it be what it is. This acceptance is the ground from which I can most effectively and powerfully pivot and act without wasting my energy and time on useless efforting.
I might ask questions to gain a better understanding of the terrain I find myself in with someone, yet do not fight for things to be different. My gaze lifting and wandering over the terrain, assessing, and reflecting while making intuitive judgements if it is conducive to growth, fruitful exchanges, and transformation or if it is too barren to support a connection.
No longer do I believe that everything that could be brought to back to life needs to be. Sometimes the most loving thing to do is to let things die and compost in order to make space for the birthing of new and aligned life. Sometimes things have to die off into the void. Sometimes the best thing to do is laugh about the contrasting views and delight in the love and joy of the connection which supersedes them.
Coming from the intensely traumatizing black and white programming of the cult I grew up in, this is an amazing achievement. Acceptance- not avoidance or numbing to contrast- goes completely against what has been entrained into me as a child. I was taught to ‘fight’, ‘take out with the root’, try to ‘convert’, distance, ‘hate’, or ‘shun’ contrast within and without.
What a gift to release more layers of the cult conditioning from my subconscious mind and liberate my being from its toxicity.
My inner peace and wellbeing are becoming more valuable and precious to me as I keep reclaiming them from layer upon layer of distorted beliefs and conditionings.