“Self-loathing is a poison so many of us drink. We cocoon in its phlegm and lose ourselves. And then we starting looking to other people to nourish our souls; to feed us attention, validation, completion, love. And when the dose is insufficient, we put others down – to their faces, in our heads -because sucking energy out of people for a whiff of fast food superiority is juicy, fatty amazingness. But this is what ugly is. It’s the fruit of self-hate’s manifestation. It’s who we become when we don’t love ourselves.
We don’t need the sugar fix of other people’s validation. Beautiful everlasting sustenance lies in self-love. It’s the Holy Grail.
I’m all for beauty products and lame selfies and overpriced lingerie, but only if it’s complimenting the flamboyance of your soul, not feeding it.
It is self-loving verve that makes someone timelessly beautiful. It embalms you in allure…forever. Do what you love, be who you are – you’re amazing.”
~ S. Chapman
The absence of self love has many destructive fruits, holding on to distorted perceptions and judgements about ourselves ends up hurting us and others on a daily basis.
In the absence of self love any care and love we attempt to give others will be undermined by the dark fruits of self loathing and turned into an ugly seed of suffering. We might blind our minds to the truth of this but our hearts will always be aware of our abusive ways, no matter how subtle or complex they manifest.
The single most liberating and healing practice we can commit to is the development and cultivation of self care and self love. Contrary to what many think loving yourself is not selfish or narcissistic but a fundamental necessity of having healthy relationships with others.
Right relating happens when we stop serving our egoic woundings and start giving freely from the fullness of our cup.